Why YOU make mistakes

Everyone always gives the bull statement of, “We all make mistakes.  You’re only human!”  Well, guess what?  There’s bigger reasons as to why you’re making those mistakes.  You aren’t making mistakes because you’re human, you’re making them because of one of three reasons, and I’m going to list them.  By the way, they are all your fault.  Yeah, big surprise.

1. You weren’t paying enough attention!
This is by far the most common.  Knowing people like I do, it’s not surprising.  Think about it.  I know it’s difficult for most of you out there, but think.  How many times have you stated either out loud or to yourself, “Damn it!  I didn’t even notice that!”

For instance, you start doing an activity thinking you’re doing great, only to find out you need something you “didn’t notice” before, which is plainly labeled in the instructions?  Yeah, probably an ass load.  Did you turn right in a “No Right on Red” section?  Yeah, it’s your fault for not paying attention to the traffic signs.

Guess what?  Yeah, those examples are all your fault.

2. You didn’t actually understand before you started
If you’re supposed to do something with precision, then you better damn well make sure you understand before you start.  It’s not too difficult to know you need glue when making a model plane.

Here’s a tip, if someone says, “Do you understand?” and you say “Yes” and begin, but fail, it’s YOUR fault.  Always make sure you know what to do.  Now, I do agree that the first time it’s explained and the subordinates don’t understand, it’s the fault of the person in charge, but the second time it’s your fault.  If you aren’t listening, then you aren’t paying attention, and if you don’t understand something because of it, you’re to blame.

If something isn’t clear, ASK, DAMN IT!  I’m not taking blame for your stupidity!  If you’re told “only raise your right hand when the yellow light is bright by itself, and not when any other light is showing” and you say that you understand, only to fail, it’s YOUR FAULT.

3. You weren’t good enough to begin with
Here’s the truth in life: No matter how much you set your mind to it, you cannot achieve everything and you are limited to your own abilities.  You can have the dream of being better than Michael Phelps, but no matter how hard you train, no matter how much you put your mind to it, chances are, you will never beat him even at a doggy paddle competition.

Attempting to write the greatest novel in existence without a great understanding of the English language is going to end in failure.  Who’s fault is that?  Yours.  Writing a book which took you five years to produce and then tanks in sales because the story is terrible is who’s fault?  Oh, that’s right, yours.  You weren’t good enough.

If you’re like all these other regular jack offs, chances are you’re just not good enough at most things, and as such, will make a lot of mistakes.

Posted 1/12/2010 at 1:58 AM on Xanga