Just got out of the hospital (s)

Yes, I’m serious.  This is not a cry for help.  Why would it be when I say that I’m OUT of and not “bound for”.  I have to get that kind of thing situated out because, aside from the people I allow to friend me, there are a lot of morons out there.

It started Monday.  I was graced with the day off because I worked Sunday.  It would be the only day this week that I worked.  Around two thirty when I decide that I’m bored as Hell and need to eat.  Well, being the health conscience guy I am, I decide to head to Chili’s and have their happy hour chips and salsa for an appetizer (it’s free during the day in the bar area), an Arnold Palmer to drink, and a buffalo chicken sandwich.  The health part is a joke in this instance.  Do you get that part?  Yes?  Are you SURE?  Moving on.

I finish up and head over to Best Buy in order to pick up a few movies.  I hadn’t really decided which ones yet, but I had thought about picking up the collections of Afro Samurai (after discovering that it actually was awesome), Shaolin Soccer (it’s funny and has good choreography) and possibly Kung-Fu Hustle (again, awesome).  Well, as I looked around I happened to glance in the video game area and see that the PS3 is now…$299.99 for a 120GB model.

The first thought in my mind was, “Ah fuck…they dropped the price again and I have the money…”  After a lot of deliberation I pick it up, along with a $20 bluetooth headset, which I can also use with my phone, and Red Dead Redemption.  Yes, I know I already have it for my X360, but it has faster load times I’ve noticed, a little smoother play, and a much better online community…plus most of my friends have the PS3 and now I can play for free with them instead of paying $60 a year to play with strangers…fucking assholes.

Anyway, it’s around 6PM and I start feeling nauseous and the sun is starting to glare my TV anyway, so I tell my buddy that I’m going to stop playing for a while.  I figure that I gave myself simulation sickness from using Dead Eye too much and making the camera whip around so much…I’m mean when I play online and do NOT fuck around.

Taking a few deep breaths, I start to feel a little better.  Now it’s around seven and I decide to take a shower.  As soon as I open the curtains…all hell breaks loose.  I spin around, throwing the toilet open and the spew starts…without mercy.  The moment that the spew stops I have to turn around and blow mud all over the toilet.

I have never been that violently ill.  At one point, it’s literally so bad, that I’m sitting on the toilet with my head in the shower.  It got so bad that I actually had to call my mother over to help me because I was so weak.  Do you have any fucking idea how horrible it is at my age to have your mother help you to and from the restroom to throw up and other things?

I ruined one of my deep pans because I couldn’t keep vomiting in the shower.  No, I’m NOT fucking kidding, it was that bad.  I couldn’t keep water down, let alone the Pedialyte.

Until about three in the morning on Tuesday the vomiting continued without mercy.  I was so weak I could barely walk.  After passing out I woke up and the nauseousness finally ceased.  I couldn’t eat, my stomach hurt beyond description, and I had knots through out my back and neck.  Light hurt my eyes, the sound of the house settling hurt my ears, and everything ached.

Figuring the worst was over, I simply called out from work and told them I would be in the next day as I got over this.  The diarrhea continued.  Almost no solid waste.  It was like the water was going straight through me.  I was starving, but couldn’t actually eat.  I would want food, but the moment anything, including plain noodles were in front of me, I couldn’t eat more than a bite.

I toughed it out through the day and went into work on Wednesday.  After being there for less than an hour and using the restroom five times, I was graciously sent home (they understand that when I am not well, I am not just playing around and are willing to work out a solution with me because of it).  At this point my mother is considering canceling going to Cali to see the rest of the family for the week, but I assure her that I am finally starting to pee a little again and I will be fine.  She and my step-father leave, and I was wrong.

I ended up in the emergency care, thanks to my grandmother and cousin being close enough to come get me, because I was so dehydrated.  The doctors were afraid that my kidneys were damaged from the severity of it all, and because I had not urinated since Monday before I had eaten.  They are still a little worried about my liver, but not a lot, because some people’s livers are just naturally slightly bigger than others, and mine didn’t seem sensitive.  Maybe that is why when I was younger I never got hangovers when I drank so much?  Not that I did that very often.

I spent hours hooked up to IV’s to get hydrated and had two failed blood tests because my veins wouldn’t cooperate *LOL*  Good news is, I’m fine now.  My kidneys no longer hurt, I’m able to keep rice and plain things like that down, and I’m just drinking Pedialyte along with water throughout the day to keep hydrated.

Now I know how people can actually die from food poisoning.  Lesson is, go to the fucking doctor’s people.  You don’t want to end up on TheDarkCreature’s table.

Posted 6/25/2010 at 1:18 PM on Xanga


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